The Photo
by icefire-lioness
Summary: Hermione is in her room and it's a very hot day. Draco isn't meant to come back for a few days, so why should she worry? Of course she should worry. This is Draco Malfoy we're talking about. Hermione is going to want revenge! New and improved version!


It was so HOT.

Hermione wandered into the Head's common room, which she unfortunately shared with one Draco Malfoy.

Luckily, he had left Hogwarts for the Easter holidays, and she had two more wonderful Draco free days to enjoy herself in.

The trouble was the heat. It was so hot she could barely think.

It was starting to get to her, the hot wind making her head ache.

She decided that, as she had the rooms to herself she might as well make the most of it.

She stripped down to her underwear and opened the window slightly.

The cool air floating around her near-naked form was a blessed relief.

She sighed contentedly and glancing at her watch, was surprised to see it was only half past three.

Suddenly overcome with drowsiness; she lay down on the carpet and closed her eyes.

She had fully intended to get up soon afterwards, but the heat, the comforting breeze and soft carpet were too much, and she dozed off.

This was the biggest mistake she could make.

Draco had decided to come back to Hogwarts early. It was just so _boring_ at home.

Malfoy Manor may be large, but there was no-one there to enjoy its large-ness with.

(And anyway, what good is it if it just large? It's just like that stupid oaf Hagrid, good-for-nothing, and his large-ness just made him a bigger good-for-nothing-er. Humm.)

He dressed quickly and then apparated to Hogsmeade.

He had learned in his fourth year summer holidays from his father, the latter of whom had taught him precisely because it was illegal.

He now stood in the centre of Hogsmeade, opposite the Three Broomsticks, where he briefly considered getting a drink but eventually decided against it, as he didn't feel entirely like having a hangover on his first day back at Hogwarts.

He walked leisurely down the path to Hogwarts and entered through a secret passage-way, feet moving steadily down the stone steps and along the dirt corridor until, after around fifteen minutes, he saw faint light up ahead.

Pushing aside the hanging that hid the passage from view, he climbed out (gracefully of course) and began to make his way to the Heads common room.

He hadn't been surprised in the least at getting Head Boy; he was, after all, Draco Malfoy.

On reaching the Portrait Hole and taking hold of the door knob, he checked himself.

Should he knock before entering, he wondered?

Granger didn't know he was back after all, and he might find her in an...erm, compromising situation.

He smirked at the thought, and then realised that a) He was a Malfoy, and Malfoy's did not knock and b) That even if he had, and he cared (which he didn't) Granger was unlikely to be doing anything _compromising._ She was too much of a goody-two-shoes.

He turned the handle and walked slowly into the common room, dropping his bags on the floor as he went.

He wasn't, after all, exactly known for his cleanliness (just OCD-like personal hygiene habits).

That, he would have said, was what elves were there for.

As he stretched his gorgeous, muscled arms (_sigh_), he noticed a pair of bare feet sticking out from behind the couch.

Curiosity aroused, he went to investigate.

As he rounded the couch he made an...interesting discovery.

Hermione Granger was lying on the ground asleep, one hand resting on her stomach, the other flung behind her head.

Her hair fanned out around her face.

Her lips were parted seductively.

This was not, however, the most interesting part.

For, as Draco had noticed rather quickly, (as hormonal teenage boys are wont to do in the face of such a spectacle) she was _very _scantily clad, and this turned him on a great deal.

Now, so you don't think any less of our Draco, he was very much aware of the fact that this was _Granger _he was staring at with, well, _lustful_ thoughts - but you have to remember: hormones + male + scantily clad female body "I'm sorry, there was cleavage and thigh and leg and stomach and skin...involved and...What was I saying?"

After all, she was wearing red lacy underwear and a bra for Merlin's sake!

And _Dammit! She's HOT!__  
_  
He had to stop these thoughts immediately - _and what better way than making her life a living hell?!  
_  
So anyway, he went back around the couch, and taking his camera out of his bag,

(He had taken a hint from that small, freaky Creevey kid who hero-worshipped Potter

(as if you would)

and had bought a camera.

(only, he could get away with it, because he was a god)

He didn't exactly carry it around with him

(He wasn't that sad), but he had found that having one on hand was very useful for situations such as this one…)

he took a few _loverly_ shots of Miss Granger in all her lingerie-ed glory.

With a sigh of something like regret, he put the camera back in his bag, and, blowing a kiss to the still unconscious and slightly snoring Hermione, he left the common room.

The portrait closed a little louder than had intended, but as he walked briskly down the corridor, he decided that he didn't really care, because he was a God, and everything he did was right.

Also, he was about to make history all over England (well, maybe just Hogwarts).

He sniggered at the image of Granger's face when she saw…well, what he was going to do. Heh heh.

With a little chuckle, he sped up, happily cursing two first years when they accidentally looked at him.

They ran away screaming like the little girls they now were, although he highly doubted they had ever been anything but.

He doubted they would be happy when they found out that the pink and green tutus' were not removable for two more days.

Not that this made him unhappy. Oh no, quite the opposite.

Draco sighed dreamily as he twirled his wand in his fingers at the thought of them struggling to remove the hideous fashion statements, and decided he had to use that one more often. It was so _f__un _making people's lives miserable! Draco did so love Hogwarts.

Hermione started at the loud banging noise, sat up and rubbed her eyes. _Damn_, she thought, _I must have fallen asleep_.

She looked at her watch._ Six pm! I have to get ready for dinner!_

She jumped up and ran to the bathroom, where she changing quickly into jeans and a loose t-shirt.

Hermione laughed lightly at what might have happened had anyone seen her as she slept.

_That_ would have been a disaster!

She ran out of the common room, wondering vaguely whose bags lay on the floor, and how they had gotten there.

The thought was pushed from her mind as she saw Ron and Harry, and she ran up to them, linking arms, the two boys greeting her with smiles.

When they reached the Great Hall, Hermione wasn't surprised to see the Slytherins look up and snigger as the threesome went past.

She was, however, surprised to see their "subordinate", Draco Malfoy, sitting amongst them. She wondered briefly when he had arrived, but her mind wandered quickly when she saw Ginny, who she sat down next to, immediately falling into conversation.

Ron and Harry sat next to her and ate hungrily (since when are those boys ever _not _hungry?), the food seeming to disappear off their plates like...magic. Although really it was just a stomach-mouth ratio gone horribly wrong.

When they were finished, Harry turned to them and yelled loudly, as though he wanted people to overhear his very 'secret' conversaton, "See you guys, I've got to go see Dumbledore - you know, about my..." he sighed dramatically, and several girls swooned, "yeah, anyway, see ya!"

People all around turned at the sound of the Boy Who Wouldn't Die's voice, and Harry rolled his eyes, though he had a huge grin on his face.

He stood quickly, brushing non existent crumbs from his robes (this, by the way, accentuated his Quidditch caused chest muscles, causing a third year Hufflepuff to faint into her soup), and Ron rose too. "I'll come with you mate, I have to go to the library anyway." he grimaced. "homework."

"You shouldn't leave it so late then should you Ronald?" lectured Hermione, but she smiled at them as she gestured for them to go.

She turned to Ginny and they began to talk about the pros and cons of boys who played Quidditch (Ginny tried not to mention that one rather large pro was that _Harry_ played Quidditch, therefore no cons existed).

Harry and Ron walked past the Slytherin table, but a comment made by Blaise Zabini stopped them in their tracks.

"You know Draco, if she wasn't a mudblood, I'd do that Granger chick _any_ time. She has gotten _fine_!" This said purely for the benefit of enraging people, and therefore not bothering to keep his voice too low.

Pansy and some of the other Slytherin girls scowled at him.

Blaise smiled winningly at them. Goal achieved. The girls muttered into their dinner, but didn't say anything to his face.

Blaise smirked and nudged Draco.

Draco turned and smirked as well, before he noticed The Weasel and Pot-Head listening and raised his voice.

"Yeah, I know what you mean - those pictures just say it all though don't they?" he sniggered unpleasantly and Harry and Ron gave him the dirtiest looks imaginable.

They made their way over to him faster than you can say "dick cheese sandwich", which, of course, thought Draco, grinning broadly, was all they were.

Harry stopped in front of Draco and, knuckles cracking fiercely, he asked politely "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, FERRET BOY!?"

Draco scowled at the name, but he couldn't pass up this perfect opportunity to KILL THE TRIO!!! mwaahhahahahahah!

Sigh. Ok, not quite, but he could still inflict some damage... dun dun duuuuun!

He drew out one of the photos of Hermione and slid it across the table, watching Harry's face carefully for a reaction.

Harry picked it up, disbelief etched all over his face.

Ron looked over his shoulder and whistled through his teeth. "What a HOTTIE." he said in a low voice "Who is i..." he paused and looked closer, eyes widening, then shrieked "HERMIONE JANE GRANGER!!!!WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU WERE WEARING??!AND WITH DRACO MALFOY TAKING PICTURES NO SODDING LESS!!" his face was steadily turning a rather unattractive purplish colour.

Draco didn't hesitate to point this out; that and the new addition to his face of a large, throbbing vein.

Everyone in the hall was silent, looking first at Ron, then at Hermione, then finally to Draco.

Hermione stood up. "what are you talking about Ron?" she asked, trying to refrain from asking him if that vein was about to pop out yet or what, as it didn't seem the mature approach.

She walked over to them, a puzzled look on her face.

Draco stood. "Well Granger, if you want to know, I'll be happy to...reveal ...it to you" he chuckled evilly and performed a tricky little spell._  
_  
Every single person in the Hall found themselves holding at least one of the photos, and after a few seconds of silence... "Oh Merlin!! She _is_ a girl!!" yelled a Ravenclaw boy.

Hermione glared daggers at him, before looking at the picture she held in her own hands and turning quite pale.

She slumped rather heavily into the nearest seat. "How...how...how did..???" she asked weakly, and finally she realised (the heat was making her a bit slow too).

She cringed at the thought of him seeing her, but quickly realised that everyone else had seen too… _he is soo dead!!_ She thought hysterically.

She was bought out of her imaginings of horrible deaths for Malfoy, by catcalls and whistles from boys all over the room.

(Just so you know how she was going to kill him; she was going to drown him in the lake, then resuscitate him, then half hang him, then get Hagrid to find Norbert and get him to burn Malfoy to a crisp while he tried to run away in a big cage, after she poked out his eyes with blunt red-hot steel cattle prods….ooOoOohh exquisite thoughts…)

"Aaw, little miss goodie-goodie is all grown up!" smirked a seventh year Slytherin who Hermione had never seen before.

She stood, and, shaking all over, as much with embarrassment as rage she said the counter spell.

All the photos disappeared and almost everyone in the room moaned and groaned and generally made a fuss.

Oh, she wanted to get revenge, but she wasn't stupid enough to do anything in front of the few teachers in the hall, so for now, she would just tell him how absolutely thick he was to mess with her.

She pointed a shaking finger in Draco's face. "That." she whispered threateningly "was _**not**_ a smart move. I am going to get revenge Malfoy, and it is gonna be BAD." She stalked out of the Great hall amid jeers and wolf-whistles. She didn't turn back once, preferring to keep as dignified a silence as was possible after such a fiasco.

Oh yes, she was going to get revenge all right. if she didn't kill that despicable creature that some people called Draco Malfoy first.


End file.
